Who Are You Dancing With?

Last weekend, I found myself in the vibrant heart of Coachella, a massive three-day music festival in the desert of Southern California. It turned out to be an enlightening parallel for life itself, a lesson in forming genuine connections on the fly.

Similar to a loud bar or club, spoken words could hardly be heard over the thunderous music. This constraint instead forced me to do "vibe checks," an underutilized skill in daily life dominated by formalized (and somewhat artificial) greetings and introductions.

My quest wasn't for the most stylish or glamorous people, but for those radiating positive and engaging energy to dance and share the amazing musical sets with. In other words, seeking authenticity over appearances.

Not everyone was open to such connections. Some appeared nervous and self-conscious about how they looked even as they bopped. Others were determined to squeeze ever closer to the stage as part of their pilgrimage to touch the musical icons they worshiped. Some were completely absorbed into their little screens, trying to capture the whole set rather than being present. Their bodies were there, but their minds were plugged in elsewhere. Still, others were rushing out the exit to get to the next set on their packed agenda.

I was intuitively aware of all these mental states as I weaved in and out of the crowd. Fortunately, the festival had an abundance of over 100,000 attendees, so the odds were good that I'd find people who were also looking to be immersed in the music and each other.

The scarce thing was time. Each set lasted only an hour, and the festival itself was three days. If after several moments, I didn't feel the chemistry with the group we parachuted into, then it was time to move on.

As I sat resting on the expansive grass lawn bridging the various stages, I realized that the festival was a microcosm for the world. Just like how I had limited time at Coachella, I also have limited time in life. Some people take time to warm up to, to get deeper. Some never get there.

That's okay because the world is big. It's up to me to seek out and attract people who are ready to connect at that level.

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